HOLY SHIT, Gamers Can’t Deal With Rape.

Originally submitted by dongle

No, really, what the fuck?

Guess what, embarrassing gamers?  People don’t think rape is really funny.  Nope, not at all.  You wanna know why?  BECAUSE IT ISN’T FUNNY.

Man, that is some deep fucking thoughts right there.

Add onto this a little chat transcript from the #tigirc (provided by , and you see even more why gamers should be embarrassed pretty much non-stop.  ALL DAY.

[11:09:26] <PleasingFungus> bleak: people who have never been raped are getting offended on behalf of people who were raped, because of a t-shirt based on a comic strip that features the word “rape.” (The t-shirt itself doesn’t have ‘rape’ on it.) 
[11:09:57] <bleak> huh. 
[11:10:07] <bleak> rape apologists, eh? 
[11:11:24] <PleasingFungus> haha 
[11:12:05] <Hangedwork> justice of convenience 
[11:12:10] <mno> I never get why people say something is offensive to another group of people 
[11:12:16] <mno> who they have -nothing- to do with 
[11:13:11] <nylos> because the people got told that it is offensive 
[11:16:01] <smn> 20:09 <Hangedwork> justice of convenience 
[11:16:01] <smn> 20:09 <mno> I never get why people say something is offensive to another group of people 
[11:16:03] * Joins: cafesofie (cafesofie@rnwifi-164-107-92-26.resnet.ohio-state.edu) 
[11:16:09] <smn> damn 
[11:16:15] <smn> didn’t wanna paste that :D 
[11:16:32] <Hangedwork> pinging people left and right 
[11:16:32] <ljnc> and yet you did 
[11:16:33] <Hangedwork> haha 
[11:16:34] <s01> wait, I can’t call people dicks for saying “niggers are stupid” just because I’m white? 
[11:16:38] * ljnc shakes his head in dismay 
[11:16:52] <Hangedwork> but that’s intended to be offensive 
[11:17:21] <Hangedwork> attacking people for assumed malice is the stupid part 
[11:17:25] <s01> it’s not intended to be offensive because no black man heard it

Man, just….holy shit.  This is just exposing so much bad gamer shit, I don’t even know what to do with it.

Oh, Hey, In Case You Thought Game Developers Weren’t Just Embarassing Fucking Gamers Too…

ugh this fucking guy.David Jaffe, the creator of the horribly embarrasing shitfest God of War games, has you covered right here  No really, this is just sad.  Destructoid’s reporting on it is just their normal parade fo sadness as well, so don’t worry.

Gamer Entitlement Is Embarrassing

In case you thought gamer’s weren’t entitled fuck, you have this post on Destructoid, which highlights an entitled gamer (WHY ISN’T THIS ON SOMETHING BETTER THAN THE WII!!!?!!?) and the entitled gamers getting mad at him (BUT THAT GAME ISN’T EVEN LEAVING JAPAN?!?!?!?!), while both ignore that the money this douchebag is purely wasting by doing this could be spent on something more worthwhile, like poor people or something.  You know, something that is an actual problem for the real world.  Not fucking videogames.

Jim “St. Trenchbloat” Sterling Strikes AGAIN!

"Mindless fun is the most artistic form of expression I can think of."

He actually says that.  He is a FUCKING IDIOT.  As usual with Trenchbloat, I have no idea where to begin, except to note that the sentence above, a direct quote, is actually NONSENSE.  On a very basic level, it doesn’t make any sense at all.

Oh, and the rest of this video ignores the various economic issues of game development, and so forth.

And yeah, the highest things someone can hope for in a game is “fun”.  Fuck you, St. Trenchbloat.


Jim Sterling’s Twitter, explained (me celebrating finding out he has a twitter and standing on the shoulders of giants to bring you to a punchline which i concede is weak at best)

1 - Jim Sterling finds homosexual interactions so illegitimate as to be humorous.

2 - Jim Sterling wants to play Mindjack online, but has no presumptions that anyone will enjoy their $60 enough to play for over a week.

3 - Jim Sterling felt wrong for a very long time.

4 - Jim Sterling can’t even see popular movies in a timely fashion.

5 - Jim Sterling teaches people to be both funnier than him and more comfortable with sexuality (see tweet #1)

6 - Jim Sterling has slut-shamed everyone on Earth and set upon the dirty, dirty skies.

7 - Jim Sterling and a child have both learned the concept of a pun (or perhaps Jim is merely attempting to bring the slower members of his audience up to speed: “Uranus” sounds a lot like “your anus.”)

8 - Jim Sterling is not known to any television networks.

9 - Jim Sterling is reenacting one of Sophocles’s masterpieces.

10 - Jim Sterling is ashamed of his sexuality, but not so much that he won’t vaguely yet bawdily tell the world about it.

11 - Jim Sterling has a sticky keyboard.

12 - Jim Sterling has awarded the coveted title of Kanye West to some guy.

13 - Jim Sterling has awarded the title of Kanye West to some guy in lieu of any more accurate analogies.

14 - Jim Sterling has no opinion of Kanye West beyond an Internet meme involving something he did at an awards ceremony last year.

15 - Jim Sterling made a broad and poorly qualified reference to someone with whom he is only familiar through an Internet meme, which apparently bothered a bunch of crybabies.

16 - Jim Sterling is generally unfollowed with little fanfare, and finds it absurd that someone would be surprised he is telling jokes a year after their timeliness faded.

17 - Jim Sterling wants all of his followers to be reminded just how hackneyed his jokes are.

18 - Jim Sterling is plotting an act of violence, and money is no object.

19 - Jim Sterling is narrowing someone’s search down to a mere 16,000 tweets.

20 - Jim Sterling has insider information about a video game.

21 - Jim Sterling would like some help asking an undisclosed entity questions about a video game.

22 - Jim Sterling is being haunted by an admirable ghost.


Yup, Jim Sterling keeps his Patron Saint title intact.

(Source: abitha)

Objectification of Fictional Women and their Butts: Go Go Gamer Embarrassment.

Check it.

Yeah, yet another “Top Ten Hottest Game Chick Whatevers” list, though this one has some amazing choice quotes to study when examining how horrid gamers treat women.

Let’s go entry by entry, shall we? Hover text is on, by the way.oh boy.

#10: “You also may have noticed that only Halo 2 and 3 are listed next to her name. Before any fanboys get all uppity, we are well aware that Cortana was in the original Halo. Maybe you should go back and check her out and then you’ll realize why we didn’t include it. Hint: she’s kinda ugly.

oh no

#9: “Alyx also fills the multi-ethnic desires of a lot of dudes. She is so exotic, in fact, that she has no choice but to make out with herself, and she has no problem getting dirty.


#8: “At some point, there has likely been a Lara Croft model that you would totally bone. Even if her ass hasn’t met your standards yet, there’s hope that it will get bigger/smaller/rounder/flatter in the future.


#7: “The Dark Queen was actually the first non-real vision of the female form that gave me a boner.


#6: “Nintendo is teaching us that it’s what’s on the inside that counts, especially if what’s on the inside is a hot babe.


#5: “Vanessa attacks her opponents by dancing hypnotically in skin-tight outfits and using the concentrated hotness to fire beams of eroticism that make her foes have brain aneurysms. That, or she just has Parkinson’s and shoots regular lasers.”


#4: “At this point, the whole “they’re just fake” argument for why videogame characters shouldn’t actually be able to turn you on, well, it goes out the window. Why? Because all four of the Beauty and the Beast chicks are actually modeled after real beauties.

oh boy.

#3: “Oh yeah, and Rayne is so legitimately hot that she actually posed for Playboy magazine as part of a special feature about hot chicks in videogames.


#2: “Realistically, it’s not much worse than a lot of outfits in women’s sports.


Special Mentions: “This is the kind of girl that begs you to cut off her head. What? Oh, alright, you can just put a bag over it.


Special Mentions BONUS: “Okay, the Rumble Roses chicks have big fat asses. There are lots of people that like big fat asses, but I’m not one of them. Sorry, Rumble Roses girls, but your asses are too fat for this list.


#1: “In addition to the fact that these polygonal posteriors are round and perky, the idea that you are surrounded by them makes it all the better. After all, a room full of nice asses is generally better than just one nice ass. Can I get an amen?

So there it is.  And holy shit, what is wrong with gamers?

This One Is a Bit Quicker…

…but still makes the point as to why exactly the previous TED Talk was so horrific.

Submitted by spikemaze.


they even have a logo.

Game Crush is a thing that actually exists.

It is a site built around gamers wanting to literally pay a woman to play a videogame with them.  That is its sole purpose, and apparently it is doing well enough that it has continued to exist for a good chunk of time now.

It might be the saddest gamer site on the net.  And it just got worse!

Whatever you do, girls who agreed to get paid to play videogames with lonely nerds, don’t ever say “no”.  We don’t get as much money if you say “no”.

GameCrush.com: Just say no to “no”.

Even TED Is Embarrassing

…or “Epic Meaning: Stop Fucking Saying Epic”

I don’t even really know where to start here, so let’s just go with some timestamped reactions:

@2:35 First but far from only use of “EPIC WIN”.  Stop using that word.  Please?

@3:50 ”In game worlds, we become the best versions of ourselves.”  Someone has clearly never played a Call of Duty game on XBox Live.

@5:20 Regarding World of Warcraft, you get an “epic mission” which “isn’t challenging” at all.  She actually says that.  Think about the word epic.  You know, like epic poetry.  Like the Odyssey.  I am pretty sure Odysseus/Ulysses got challenged a couple times in there.  Maybe. 

@5:45 ”+20 Crazy Idea. I don’t get that feedback in real life” Except that you do, but are too dumb to notice it because all you think about are videogames and videogame numbers.  See people reacting to you in the audience?  That is called feedback.

@5:55 World of warcraft is “just better than reality”. Is it? What the fuck is wrong with you?

@Fuck if I know when ”GAMING VIRTUOSOS”.  That title is the equivalent of being the king/queen of a specific piece of the vacuum of space.  Good job, benevolent ruler of nothing!

@9:55 ”Blissful Productivity”…ugh.

@10:20 “Epic Meaning” HOLY SHIT SHE ACTUALLY SAID THAT WHAT THE FUCK.  Bonus: “Epic knowledge resource”  Double bonus: Fuck you.

@Somewhere near the end of this beast "We are ready for our own epic game" and "Imagine Epic Wins".  We are ready for this particular person to shut the hell up and imagine her own fiery death, then make it real.

And no, none of that will ever be epic.

Thanks to Auntie Pixelante for the heads up.

An Icon of a Saint.

sometimes, a man comes along.

Ronk, we salute you.

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